When I finally don't wake up I just want to be understood.
I just want to have felt that peace when I run out of air.
If these words whipped from these lips has not pushed you away,
then I'll throw everything to you.





I'm not going to post in this journal anymore.

Oct. 5th - Edge the Movie
Oct. 9th - Mountain Man and Hostage Calm
Oct. 10th - Swollen Eyes, Beartrap and Borderland
Oct. 11th - Owen
Oct. 12th - Salem for Columbus Day
Oct. 22nd - Borderland, Maker and Transit
Oct. 23rd - Tour.

After I'm home from tour, I'm moving out. I need to get out of my house. I'm going to sell my car and get a one bedroom apartment somewhere in or around the city.

there is a void.

I don't update this that much anymore and when I do it's pointless. I know I have stuff I want to talk about but I'm drawing a blank.

I'm tired all the time. I want to move out.

I'll be your friend in hell, until then I despise you and I probably always will.

"I am a loser and so are you. At least I have no problem admitting something I already knew. And if you think your bullshit attitude is gonna stop me well, I've got news for you."



Fuck yourself<3

"Fuck you.




You mean absolutely nothing to me. Nothing."


Couldn't have said it any differently Jarrod.

Yesterday was such a good day. Warped Tour for free. Set Your Goals with like 30 kids for free. Delicious Town Spa, not for free but still good.

Today if probably going to be real busy. I still have to burn cds and then we have to put them all together. I have to work 5-9 too. Tomorrow we leave for a few days and I could not be more excited.

8======D

I wish you could see how fucking dumb you are.

1. It's dumb when a girl who is somewhat more mature than most other girls her age, if not girls older than her, acts differently and feels the need to act like an idiot when she is with a certain person.

2. Why should anyone live their life depending on a certain substance? Not nescessarly drugs or alcohol, but mainly in this situation drugs and alcohol. I can't have faith in anyone that lives their life that way. How can you let yourself be controlled by something that is so insignificant?

3. My dad.

"you're a door-without-a-key, a field-without-a-fence
you made a holy fool of me and I've thanked you ever since.
if she comes circling back we'll end where we'd begun
like two pennies on the train track the train crushed into one
or if I'm a crown without a king, if I'm a broken open seed
if I come without a thing, then I come with all I need
no boat out in the blue, no place to rest your head,
the trap I set for you seems to have caught my leg instead"

Thursday June 11th - Energy, Debaser, Beartrap @ Rad Skatepark
Friday June 12th - Borderland @ East Bridgewater Commercial Club
Saturday June 13th - Algernon Cadwallader, A Great Big Pile Of Leaves, Debaser @ some place in Milford
Sunday June 14th - Borderland, The Wonder Years @ Romans

So awesome.

I just want to cook for a girl. Then watch a movie and drive her home listening to Owen.

It was weird seeing you for that second tonight. I showed you that place. I brought you there the day everything went to shit, that was the last time we saw each other. I don't feel sad or upset about it either. I'm glad you walked out when you noticed me because I wasn't going anywhere. If that's your new boy I wish I could have followed and looked him in the eye and told him not to waste his time. I want to say I hope everything's good, but I can't.

I had MaryLous for the first time today and it was really good. Borderland played at the Weymouth Teen Center and then got kicked out of the Weymouth Teen Center.